Last night, I trapped myself inside of an IKEA Hemnes dresser. I was trying to single-handedly move this massive thing through an extremely narrow space into the utility room but there’s this funny little protrusion of knobs and metal casings that I’m pretty sure is part of our ancient heater, and it’s located in such a way that I couldn’t simply slide the dresser through. All the drawers had been removed so it wasn’t exactly heavy, but I quickly became aware of my faulty logic: I propped two of the legs on the metal casing, thinking I could get inside the hollow interior of the dresser and lift it up and over the protrusion. WRONG. I crawled inside but wasn’t strong enough to lift it nor could I maneuver in the tight space. Then I accidentally un-propped the legs so that I blocked the opening where I was able to initially crawl in, and now I was well and truly stuck.
I hollered for K, but she was two floors above me and couldn’t hear my pleas for help. Crouching inside of the dresser, I contemplated my plight. The faint strains of piano music floated down from above, which meant she had started practicing, which meant she might be clueless of her trapped mother for at least another hour. I had no idea when M would get home from work. Conundrum. I thought of the book entitled The Extraordinary Journey of the Fakir Who Got Trapped in an IKEA Wardrobe that I purchased many months ago and made a mental note to read it. I had a whole new level of appreciation for the absurdity of my situation. Maybe it could become a book! It lacked in plot somewhat, but could I incorporate some deep insights that came about from my unwitting incarceration?
That daydream was cut short because K and I must be cosmically connected or she didn’t want to practice her piano or something since she came bounding down the basement stairs calling my name a few minutes later. “Why are you inside of the dresser, Mama?” It was a very good question.
Between the two of us, we were able to release me from the dresser innards and move it smoothly into the utility room. We high-fived at this impressive display of girl power, and I now finally had enough room in the other part of the basement for my outrageous fabric stash.
Remember how I was going to go through and purge? Didn’t happen. I decided to just move everything back into the basement because I was beset by choice fatigue. I left just two of the baskets you see above in my sewing area and congratulated myself on this wise choice because 30+ bins of fabric = insanity. Besides, I’d already spent too much time inside of a dresser and I’m a woman on a mission to get things done. Upwards and onwards!
Oh, how funny. Glad you weren’t stuck there too long. Thanks for the chuckle.
Oh, the things I do, Masha! 🙂
Oh my, that sounds so much like what I would do to myself. I had to have a “I shouldn’t laugh but I am” moment. People in glass houses that sort of thing 🙂
I buy a lot of my fabric online – the store here carries pretty limited stock and the next closest store is probably 400km away in one direction, then next one after 700km in the other direction. So while I get some hits, I get a lot of misses too! I’d love to find out what you plan to do with yourpurge 🙂
Haha, glad I’m not the only one who would end up entrapped in a dresser, Gracie! I imagine the online fabric shopping can be a little dicey sometimes. I don’t shop online much since I do have access to some great fabric shops here in Seattle, but Miss Matatabi is consistently excellent! 🙂
My boyfriend locked me inside our appartment once (my keys were with a friend who had come to feed the cat while we were travelling, he locked the door on his way out and I was stuck)… Trapped in a dresser is a new one though!
Oh no!! A friend of mine also got locked in her apartment because the door got jammed or something and she was supposed to be on her way to the airport to catch a flight (I think she made it? I’ll have to double-check). We all have at least one of these types of stories, don’t we :-)?
Oh my goodness, I thought you were blogging while trapped when I read the title! Glad you got out safely.
Haha! Now THAT would have been impressive! Thanks, Denise! Love your profile pix, by the way – you look lovely :-).
What I hate the most is locking my keys in the car. Sometimes my keys and my phone. Not a good feeling. AAA doesn’t come quickly! I also understand your “making choices” overload! Tidy is an elusive dream. Condo makes it seem promising, though.
Gah! That’s happened to us too!! And so true about AAA…I do think I’m getting closer and closer to a more streamlined way of living, but man, it takes a long time to get there (at least for me). I have about 10 garbage bags ready for donations, but I’m a little stumped with our current carless situation. I guess I can call for a pick-up? I’ve never done that before so must investigate.
Thanks for the laugh, mostly because it’s so relatable! It’s good to know that there are other people out there who just go for it when the mood strikes instead of waiting for back-up 🙂
I do get impulsive about just getting things done sometimes without considering all angles. :-). There was also a part of me that was thinking, “Pffft, I’ve got this. I don’t need no man.” And hey, it turned out K and I were perfectly capable! Thanks, Kathryn.
leave it to you to have the best story ever:) Hard to beat that one!
:-). The things I get myself into, Lucinda. You have no idea…
That’s the funniest thing I’ve read in weeks 😀 No wonder you didn’t feel like purging afterwards, I think you deserved a rest!
Thanks Hannah! I thought I deserved a rest too :-).
OMG this is tragically hilarious. You go girl!
I think I need a t-shirt that says “Tragically Hilarious”. That seems to be the theme of my life so often ;-). Thanks, Meg!