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Sanae Ishida

A crafty little atelier in a grey city

Are You Proud of You?

February 3, 2016

kpainting

K often runs up to me to show me something she’s made: a song, a story, a drawing. “Are you proud of me?” she asks.

I ask back, “Are you proud of you?” As someone who grew up needing a lot of external validation and knowing how hard and fickle and endlessly dissatisfying that can be, I do what I can to plant little seeds of self-approval in my little girl. I like to watch her glow, nod, and say, yes, yes I am. I’m so proud of me. I might be naive to think that this will instill a lifelong habit of creating a sense of worth that doesn’t depend on others’ feedback, but one can always hope.

Incidentally, K did that painting above at an art camp last year. The campers studied and imitated impressionists, as you can tell, and this is her interpretation of The Manneport, Cliff at Etretat by Monet. Kids are amazing.

Filed in: life • by sanae • 26 Comments

Comments

  1. gretaclark

    February 3, 2016 at 5:03 am

    Amazing. I want to go to art camp!

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 3, 2016 at 4:55 pm

      She had a blast at art camp and painted two other beautiful canvases!

      Reply
  2. Asmita

    February 3, 2016 at 7:58 am

    I relate to everything that you said up there. Thanks for sharing this.

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 3, 2016 at 4:56 pm

      Thank you, Asmita! The other day she started a sentence with “I’m so proud of myself for…” and that made me so happy!

      Reply
      • Asmita

        February 3, 2016 at 11:03 pm

        This is perhaps unrelated but I was reminded of your book too when I read this post–it has been so useful for trying to remind ourselves (the big and small ones in the house) that it is “trying” that counts, not perfection. So much of being proud of oneself is tied in with that, I feel. Somehow this post reminded me of that sentiment. I do hope someday you write more children’s books. My daughter and I love the Kunoichi one so much.

        Reply
        • sanae

          February 4, 2016 at 5:04 pm

          I think they all tie together Asmita. Thank you so much! I would love to do more children’s books, and you never know…;-)

          Reply
  3. Jana

    February 3, 2016 at 11:11 am

    Ha, is it blasphemy if I prefer K’s version to Monet’s? I think it’s really cool! (:

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 3, 2016 at 4:56 pm

      Haha! Not at all – I love her version more too! Thanks, Jana!

      Reply
  4. Melissa

    February 3, 2016 at 11:23 am

    That is a beautiful painting! Must be something passed on in the genes,no? 😉

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 3, 2016 at 5:00 pm

      Thank you, Melissa! M is actually more artistic than I am, and I see a lot of his creative style in K :-).

      Reply
  5. Katie

    February 3, 2016 at 2:15 pm

    I definitely relate to this! I say the same thing to my kids all the time.

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 3, 2016 at 4:57 pm

      Awesome! Parenting can be so tricky sometimes and I make a ton of mistakes, but this is one thing I’m pretty consistent about. 🙂 Thanks Katie!

      Reply
  6. Emi

    February 3, 2016 at 5:20 pm

    Beautiful. And such a good reminder on encouraging self-approval and confidence in our children!

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 4, 2016 at 5:03 pm

      Thank you, Emi! It’s also a reminder for me :-).

      Reply
  7. Annie

    February 3, 2016 at 9:29 pm

    Thank you for this post! My little girl asks that question all the time, I should start asking back 🙂
    The panting is beautiful!

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 4, 2016 at 5:04 pm

      I’m glad you found this helpful, Annie! I love to hear that.:-)

      Reply
  8. Lucinda

    February 4, 2016 at 8:45 am

    You’re such a good mom, Sanae – intentional and wise. Giving K the tools she needs to develop into a confident young woman. You and M are doing a great job:)

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 4, 2016 at 5:05 pm

      I really hope they’re tools that she can use. She’s starting to roll her eyes because I ask her this so much, but she’s catching on! 🙂 Thanks, Lucinda!

      Reply
  9. Liza jane

    February 4, 2016 at 7:21 pm

    Gorgeous! Her painting is just gorgeous!

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 4, 2016 at 9:07 pm

      Thanks, Liza Jane! I know that you’re an art teacher yourself, so it’s extra complimentary to read your comment :-)!

      Reply
  10. marit

    February 8, 2016 at 5:26 am

    Hello Sanae,

    it’s a while since i commented last but i read every line of furoku and here. I have to comment: Are you proud of you? Hej, i mean you, Sanae!
    I love the scarve and cardi and Jeans (and a book, A BOOK!”!!!!) you produced and hope you look at your work and be proud!

    Marit

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 8, 2016 at 7:24 pm

      My dear friend Marit, thank you so much for asking me :-). The answer is “Yes!” As you know from the Furoku and the behind-the-scenes, not everything has been a bed of roses, but each and every moment of creating the various projects have been SO worth it!

      Reply
  11. Jenny

    February 8, 2016 at 8:46 pm

    What a wonderful gift you are giving K, by imparting to her this valuable life lesson.
    And I LOVE that painting!

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 9, 2016 at 4:24 pm

      Thanks Jenny! I try my best (with lots of mistakes along the way), and K makes great art, that’s for sure 🙂

      Reply
  12. kristin

    February 8, 2016 at 10:11 pm

    ah, i love this post. the art and the sentiment both. good mama.

    Reply
    • sanae

      February 9, 2016 at 4:24 pm

      🙂 Thanks, lady! I’m pretty sure I learn more from her tho.

      Reply

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